Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Coffee morning leaves a bitter taste

WE ALL know that old people can be bitter and vindictive - anyone who's experienced the hand-to-hand fighting in the queue at the Post Office on pension day will know what they're capable of - but to suggest that they might willingly maim toddlers is a bit beyond the pale.

Yet pensioners have been banned from holding a coffee morning at a public library in Peterborough amid just such fears.

The seven members of the over-50s coffee morning club have met at the library without incident for the last four years, but now 'officials' claim that toddlers who use the building at the same time could be injured by hot coffee.

Well, yes, of course they could, but they could also be hit by a block of ice dropped from a passing aeroplane, struck by lighting on the way there, or battered to death by their feckless parents while social services look on.


Anonymous Michael Jackson's ghost said...

Perhaps they should ban books from Peterborough libraries. You never know - some unfortunate toddler might get a paper cut from one.

10:33 AM  
Anonymous Al said...

Maybe they should just ban toddlers from libraries. They are meant to be quiet places after all, and no place for toddlers to be charging around while their over-indulging parents look on approvingly.

12:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Books are dangerous anyway. They give people ideas. That won't do, in Brown's totalitarian state.

6:03 AM  
Anonymous a taxi driver said...

I had that Andy Murray in the back of my cab once.

What a bastard, eh guv?

3:37 AM  
Anonymous another faux cockney said...

I can't read, so I won't comment!

9:10 AM  
Anonymous CJ said...

Ah Al, how behind the times you are. Apparently libraries are no longer the havens of peace and quiet they once were. Our Stalinist government has released an edict encouraging the playing of music, chatting and general social interaction among the stacks. Stops people concentrating and learning dangerous stuff like how to have a mind of their own.

10:07 AM  
Blogger Mark B said...

String em up, it's the only thing they understand!

6:42 AM  

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