Friday, September 22, 2006

Battered sausages and salad-dodgers



IF ONE image sums up the lumpen proletariat that is this nation’s underclass, it’s that picture of the fat woman from Rotherham, bingo wings flapping, pushing battered sausages and chips through the school railings to her salad-dodging son.

It really is enough to make you weep. Is she completely deluded? Does she not understand that the reason battered sausage and chips are not available inside the railings is because scrotes like her are feeding up a generation of obese monsters? Or is it just that she’s afraid that if her darling boy gets exposed to exotic foodstuffs like pasta and parsnips, she won’t be able to live up to his culinary expectations at home? Let’s face it, microwave pizza and oven chips is hardly a challenging diet, even if they do splash out on Findus Crispy Pancakes and Angel Delight at the weekend.

I could even handle it if it was just her own offspring that she was fattening up for Christmas, but her and two mates were taking up to 60 orders a day from other kids as well. (And isn’t this what ASBOs were invented for?) No doubt it’s a nice little earner once you’ve pocketed your commission from Mr Chippy. I may even try it myself. Must dash – off down to the local primary school with hundredweight of deep-fried Mars Bars and 10 gallons of Sunny Delight.

IT WAS World Alzheimer’s Day yesterday. I just thought you ought to know that. And doesn’t that Prince William look just like his lovely mother?

LIFE INCREASINGLY comes to resemble a Not The Nine O’Clock News sketch; the one with the stupid policeman who keeps arresting the same man for “having big lips and curly hair”. Only this time the boot is on the other foot.

A seemingly respectable, white, middle-aged mechanic from Stirling in Scotchland was arrested and thrown in the cells for 48 hours after an off-duty policeman saw him “revving his car in a racist manner” and called in fellow cops. No, really.

The alleged incident occurred when Mr Ronnie Hutton’s Lotus sports car started playing up just as Mr Isam Maigel (28) and his burkha-clad wife Hana Saad (23), a Libyan couple who had only been in the country for two days, happened to walk by. Mr Hutton pulled into the kerb and revved his V8 engine five or six times, triggering the Racial Awareness Panic Button of Chief Inspector Eion Jenkins, another passer-by.

Mr Hutton was later arrested at his home and spent the weekend in the clink before being charged with “causing distress by acting in a racially aggravated manner”. Thankfully, the charge was later thrown out by Stirling Sheriff Court for lack of evidence.

Now I have no way of knowing if Mr Hutton was being a prat or not, but the Libyans don’t seem to have suffered immensely even if he was. And I do know that if Stirling Police had used their resources more wisely, they’d have been able to send even more officers to rough up Cherie Blah for her alleged assault on an innocent, strapping teenager.

IT WAS World Alzheimer’s Day yesterday. I just thought you ought to know that. And doesn’t that Prince William look just like his lovely mother? Yes, two sugars please …

THIS WHOLE issue of making people welcome blew up again this week (although that’s probably an inappropriate term) when John “Bruiser” Reid, this month’s Home Secretary, took himself off to Leyton in London to encourage parents to turn their kids in if they thought they were getting a bit radical, Islam-wise.

One bloke got a bit agitated about this and demanded to know what Mr Reid was doing “in a Muslim area”. And therein lies the rub. There can be no “Muslim areas” if we’re ever going to crack this integration thingy.

The incident sparked a phone-in debate of the usual intellectual quality on Radio 5 Live, with one caller complaining that he had an “immigrant” living in his street and that it was the only house where the lawn wasn’t kept neat and tidy. I can just imagine the neighbourhood opprobrium that must greet the poor bloke every time he ventures outdoors. Damn these English with their tyranny of gnomes and three-otter water features.

SO, JUST as we lose one TV hero in crocodile tormentor Steve Irwin, another much-loved giant of the small screen is snatched away from us.

A charismatic personality with a love of speed, a heroic willingness to take risks, a dedication to duty not often seen these days and with an overwhelming desire to explain and educate, we will surely miss him.

So RIP, Raymond Baxter, Spitfire pilot and Tomorrow’s World presenter.

OF COURSE, given the tragic events of recent days, we shouldn’t be blasé about Health and Safety issues. So it was entirely appropriate that Terrington Parish Council in North Yorkshire was ordered to conduct a detailed risk assessment in every location in the village before it can go ahead with its 10th anniversary fete next year.

It’s Political Correctness Gone Mad, you cry – but would you want to be the unfortunate policeman who has to inform a parent that their child has fallen over and grazed a knee during the egg and spoon race? And while incidences of spontaneous combustion involving school choirs are relatively rare in this country, you really can’t be too careful. You wouldn’t want to see that new church hall go up in smoke, would you?

I AM grateful to the Department of Transport for relaxing the regulations regarding hand baggage on aeroplanes. It is comforting to know that despite the chaotic queues; the over-the-top (and up-the-bottom) body searches; having to take off your belt, braces, shoes and truss; the suspicious glances at your shoes and the rampant paranoia that makes anyone who’s spent two weeks in the sun an imminent exploder, I can now once again take my tuba on holiday with me.

IT WAS World Alzheimer’s Day yesterday. I just thought you ought to know that. And doesn’t that Prince William look just like his lovely mother? And ooh, those daddy longlegs. They’re everywhere …

O The views of Mr Beelzebub are purely personal and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the Editor or staff of this website, of anyone who doesn't think that poor Richard Hammond's crash was caused by his booster seat slipping, of anyone who was lying in hospital hoping to get a Hammond Organ for Christmas, or of anyone who doesn't think that Margaret Beckett and the Caravan Club had something sinister to do with this terrible accident.

38 Comments:

Anonymous tony b.liar said...

Great stuff, baz - back to your usual high standards after the "Italian Job". But why no mention of the Pope? Are you afraid some nutter will put out a Fatwah on you????

12:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hang on, have I got this right? On the one hand we have Ronnie Hutton locked up for a W/E for revving up his car,upsetting an "off duty" police officer due to the fact that two Lebanese (immigrants / asylum seekers?)are in the vicinity.
On the other hand we have placard waving, ranting Islamics spitting out bile on our streets every other week whilst "on duty" police officers lounge around with arms folded looking the other way.
You couldn't make it up!

12:11 PM  
Blogger kris said...

laugh out loud stuff Bazza!

2:46 PM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

Quality stuff Bazza.
Seeing as the DVLA know where our cars are, whether they are taxed or not, where we live and tell us that there is nowhere to hide then maybe we should put the bastards in charge of immigration.

9:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your picture denoting a hamster in a dragster, is crass, stupid and in very poor taste.

You are not remotely funny.

You are, however, a clapped out, bitter, pissed old hack.

11:51 PM  
Anonymous tony b.liar said...

Right on, James - but the trouble is, if you put the DVLA in charge of immigration they would cock it up, wouldn't they? They are only interested in flogging daft reg numbers and in ferreting out the tiny minority of law abiding folk who occasionally make mistakes, own their own homes, are traceable,and have funds to pay fines, because they are the only people thay can realistically expect to get any money from. The rest of the tattooed, bemetalled dross one sees wandering about looking in the Pound Shops are not worth persuing because they "can't pay/won't pay". such is the state of the nation - I can feel a "Daily Mail moment" coming on....

11:57 PM  
Anonymous thick & anonymous said...

If something is crass why would you then describe it as stupid as well? Now that really is crass.

3:13 AM  
Blogger Bag said...

Mmmmm. Hammond isn't dead. Good one about the booster seat though. I'll use that one.

btw : How did Anonymous know you had been drinking? Must be someone close to home. Watch your back.

8:43 AM  
Blogger kris said...

Anon said: "You are not remotely funny".

I'm sorry, but I've just read it and laughed again.

I take it back- you're not a twat after all.

1:31 PM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

I thought that "anyone who was lying in hospital hoping to get a Hammond Organ for Christmas" was a bit more subtle than the booster cushion one. What's wrong with being a clapped out, bitter, pissed old hack if people find some fun in what you write?

10:54 PM  
Blogger sky_dog said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:41 AM  
Blogger sky_dog said...

anon:'Your picture denoting a hamster in a dragster, is crass, stupid and in very poor taste.

You are not remotely funny.

You are, however, a clapped out, bitter, pissed old hack.'

High praise from the 'grey pride' movement. ;o)

I thought it was bloody hilarious. Raymond Baxter will be sadly missed. Whatever happened to Judith Haan? Was she a Spitfire pilot too?

12:44 AM  
Blogger sky_dog said...

tony b.liar:'Are you afraid some nutter will put out a Fatwah on you????'

He's probably more afraid that some fat fundamentalist Celtic supporter will put a 'nutwah' on him ! ;o)

12:46 AM  
Anonymous tony b.liar said...

Sky Dog,

Judith Hann wasn't a Spitfire pilot I dont' think [too young], but this is what happened to her:

Judith Hann born (September 8, 1942) at Littleover, Derby, Derbyshire, England, is a freelance broadcaster and writer specialising in science, food and the environment. Previously presenter of BBC's Tomorrow's World between 1974 and 1994. She studied zoology at Durham University and has since had small guest appearances on various TV shows, and has been doing some TV commercials. Recently a Shredded Wheat advertisement [1]. Using her better scientific judgements to inform viewers that the product can possibly help to keep the viewers hearts healthy [2] She recently presented a programme on BBC Radio 4, "Two's a Crowd".

Currently she runs her own farm and her own successful media training and presentation skills company with her husband John Exelby.

**********************************
So now we know.

BTW, Mr Anon, I thought Bazza's crack about the Hammond Organ was a good one too, and in the best POSSIBLE taste!! Must rush, gotta get to the Nu Lab Conference to tell everyone how "important" I am!!! Pip Pip!

1:47 AM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

Bulgaria and Romania get the green light to join the European Union - that's all we fucking need on top of the poxy Poles - Pikey bastards and Bulgars putting us out of jobs. Next it will be the bastard Turks.
Enoch was right send them all fucking home!!!!!!

10:59 AM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

The deal clears the way for Turkey - large, poor and overwhelmingly Muslim - to start entry talks in October 2005. There we fucking go - please excuse the expletives but I've got fucking Tourettes!

11:03 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

This immigration malarkey is merely a case of mass "divide and conquer".

Our damned government on one hand wails about immigration causing trouble and draining resources, and on the other it allows it to go ahead. Lets face it, the Turks/Bulgarians/Poles/Romanians etc aren't going to be living where THEY live, are they?

And whilst we're fighting them, and they're fighting is, Teflon Tony and his Nu Tory pals can carry on shafting us.

4:14 PM  
Anonymous John Bull said...

At least the Poles have come to graft and they pay taxes an' all. That's more than you can say for the million drunken, workshy Giro-Jockoes that live in England.

I know who's my first choice.

1:27 AM  
Blogger sky_dog said...

tony b'liar:'Judith Hann wasn't a Spitfire pilot I dont' think [too young], but this is what happened to her:'

Cheers for that Tony !

You seem to know a lot about her. You haven't been stalking her have you? ;o)

6:34 AM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

Get it right fucking up you John Bull - you are a disgrace to the name immigrant loving bawbag!

9:08 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

I dunno, Jimmy. I'm mostly with John Bull here.

Take the fat lazy twat who lives next door to me. Waste of bloody space, and the best argument I've ever heard for contraception.

The fat bastard won't work, sponges off his girlfriend, in return for which he beats her up fairly often, drive HER car like a lunatic, is banned from every pub in the area, and has the self control of an alleycat. When he's not pissed, he's out of his tiny brain on drugs (and we're not talking a bit of marijuana or hash here) and treats all and sundry to his collection of crap music.

Could the Bulgarians etc REALLY be any worse? I mean, they're getting off their arses enough to come here, whereas that fat twat is unlikely to go any further than the dole office. And no doubt he resents that, too.

And all of this in an area of less than 1% unemployment.

Trouble is, there's millions like him.

More scary is that he's not a 19 year old "Billy", the prick is somewhere in his 30's.

1:50 PM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

I'm not saying that there are no wasters in this country but there are a lot of genuine people who are unemployed. If you lose your job when you are over 40 you don't have much chance of getting another no mattter how good your CV is.
When you allow immigrants to flood in (as this country has done for decades) the employers have a field day - most of the Poles are working for less than the minimum wage and pay no taxes.
Tell me a Pakistani corner shop that has had the same owner for two years. Every year it changes hands to his brother or nephew so no tax is payable.
I know for a fact that 10 Pakistani males were using the same driving licence.
These people get every benefit yet we have old folks who have worked and paid taxes all their lives and can't get a pension to live on!
John Bull don't make me laugh.

11:14 PM  
Anonymous tony b.liar said...

First point: Sky Dog - no I'm not stalking Judith Hann, although I seem to remember she possessed a splendid wobbly rear.........you can get all the griff on Judith and her fellow presenters from www.wikipedia.org

Second point: sorry to hear that the Tourette's has come back again Jim - it's a bugger innit?

Final point: I'm not even going to venture into the general debate with Jimmy, J.Bull and Black Dog about immigrants, but would just like to mention that our lying PM and his incompetent and corrupt government "ministers" should be ashamed of themselves - when they told us that they anticipated 13,000 new workers to arrive after the last EU expansion, it turned out afterwards that upwards of 650,000 had actually descended on us. Anybody like a bet on how many Bulgarians and Rumanian gypsies will turn up after Christmas??? No, I thought not!!

It reminds me of my favourite MP, the appalling Dr Stephen Ladyman ["Minister for Traffic Jams" and Darling's sidekick] saying that "BBC's Top Gear programme does not glorify speed"! HELLLO!

12:35 AM  
Anonymous John Bull said...

Jimmy, this country has allowed immigrants to flood in for centuries, not decades: we are a strong mongrel race because of it.

The reason people are unemployed is generally because they are soft and idle due to the benefits system. The reason immigrants are resented is because their presence exposes what a bunch of wasters we have produced at home.

Anyone who calls out an English cowboy plumber when there is a cheap and competent Polish one desperate to be of good service wants their fucking heads examined.

Pensions for old are paid for by a young productive workforce not idle parasites boozing away their dole. We need these Poles!

The Bulgarians and Romanians, however, you can keep. They will be big time trouble, mark my words.

12:56 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

Another aspect of this argument is that the British are pretty docile and stupid. They've been sold U.S style politics, economics and culture for at least the last 40 years. It's hardly worked in the U.S, where social malaise and no morality in most walks of life are the norm. Our press is so bad even the US newspapers and media cringe at the things they get away with.

It's been said before that the British could do with a revolution, but the problem is, we have our priorities completely wrong. Time and again, sky-high house prices are presented to us as GOOD, whilst the government sneakily remove the cost of housing- be it rent or mortgage- from their sums when assessing inflation.

Even if you believe their lies about not paying much more for stuff, it's plain to anyone that it's all very well paying about the same for food, cars, furniture, phone calls etc, but almost everyone's largest expenditure is for housing. That cost, of course, is through the roof. THAT is real inflation, yet the only people actually doing well out of the housing boom are the money lenders, estate agents, government and those down sizing, as well as the greedy bastard developers.

That, coupled with the highest rate of personal lending in Europe, is bound to bring very severe problems.

But no, government wants to distract anyone from seeing this, and hence we hear nothing but talk of being flooded with immigrants.

Yes, John Bull, we've had immigration as far back as history records. Henry II brought in loads of Flemish people to the south east and mid-Wales, William I brought with him not just Normans and Frenchmen, but also Bretons. The industrial revolution saw large numbers of Welsh and Scots move into England, and large numbers of SW English moved into South Wales. Jews settled in large numbers in Manchester, Leeds and London- and the Isles of Wight and Man as far back as the late 18th century. It's always been there.

But when these people want to form "Muslim only" areas etc, then it's time to put a stop to it.

Jimmy, I agree about pensioners, but isn't their poor standard of living just a wider symptom of our attitude towards wealth and society? The "I'm alright, Jack" syndrome? Pensioners, like the small minority of HONEST unemployed, are invisible. They get no airspace on the TV, the ridiculous "home improvement" and house buying programs never mention that when they describe a £250,000 house as a bargain, there are millions of WORKING Brits who'd have to get a 1000 year mortgage to afford this.

Like in the US, the poor are ignored, aren't newsworthy, and don't count anymore.

In fact, large numbers of immigrant workers is going to make things worse IF we don't stay vigilant. Hard to believe, but most employers begrudge the poxy £5.05p minimum wage. An influx of foreign labour willing to work for less will probably result in even lower wages- under the guise of "Market forces".

But apart from that, I'm no more enamoured of the Average Brit than I am of Johnny Foreigner. I'd sooner have a well behaved and decent Asian living next door to me than the (white English) fat idle twat who currently lives there.

8:15 AM  
Anonymous tc said...

A Fable

Rest Of The World Version:

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

THE END


Welcome to The British Version:

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed.

A social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are cold and starving. The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper; with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food.

The British press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty. The Labour Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and The Grasshopper Council of GB demonstrate in front of the squirrel's house.

The BBC, interrupting a cultural festival special from Notting Hill with
breaking news, broadcasts a multi cultural choir singing "We Shall
Overcome". Ken Livingstone rants in an interview with Trevor McDonald that the squirrel has gotten rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his "fair share" and increases the charge for squirrels to enter inner London.

In response to pressure from the media, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The squirrel's taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the grasshopper did not want to work.

The grasshopper is provided with a council house, financial aid to furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be socially mobile. The squirrels food is seized and re-distributed to the more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper.

Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start building a new home. The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get to Britain as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On arrival they tried to blow up the airport because of Britain's apparent love of dogs.

The cats had been arrested for the international offence of hijacking and attempted bombing but were immediately released because the police fed them pilchards instead of salmon whilst in custody. Initial moves to then return them to their own country were abandoned because it was feared they would face death by the mice. The cats devise and start a scam to obtain money from peoples credit cards.

A Panorama special shows the grasshopper finishing up the last of the squirrels' food, though Spring is still months away, while the council house he is in, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain the house. He is shown to be taking drugs. Inadequate government funding is blamed for the grasshoppers drug 'illness'.

The cats seek recompense in the British courts for their treatment since arrival in UK.

The grasshopper gets arrested for stabbing an old dog during a burglary to get money for his drugs habit. He is imprisoned but released immediately because he has been in custody for a few weeks. He is placed in the care of the probation service to monitor and supervise him. Within a few weeks he has killed a guinea pig in a botched robbery.

A commission of enquiry, that will eventually cost £10,000,000 and state the obvious, is set up.

Additional money is put into funding a drug rehabilitation scheme for
grasshoppers and legal aid for lawyers representing asylum seekers is increased. The asylum seeking cats are praised by the Government for enriching Britain's multicultural diversity and dogs are criticised by the government for failing to befriend the cats
The grasshopper dies of a drug overdose. The usual sections of the press blame it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity and his traumatic experience of prison. They call for the resignation of a minister.

The cats are paid a million pounds each because their rights were infringed when the government failed to inform them there were mice in the United Kingdom.

The squirrel, the dogs and the victims of the hijacking, the bombing, the burglaries and robberies have to pay an additional percentage on their credit cards to cover losses, their taxes are increased to pay for law and order and they are told that they will have to work beyond 65 because of a shortfall in government funds.

The End

10:42 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

Lots of truth in that, but there's plenty of hard working, non-feckless POOR people out there. There's plenty, for starters, earning national minimum wage. And those who have already done their work, the pensioners.

You COULD say "go to college/university/what used to be a tech", but that's hardly free, and degrees are 10 a penny now, hence no guarantee of a job.

As Jimmy Mc T said, try getting a job once you're past 40. And there's legions of people in that very situation, what with the intentional slaughter of British manufacturing.

The idea shouldn't be to impoverish the more fortunate and hard working, but it's an obscenity that wealth should continue being distributed upwards- and also to the "grasshoppers" in your fable. Joe Ordinary in the middle pays for all.

It's not as simple as "idle poor" versus "hard working rich". I'm hard working, highly educated, motivated but bloody poorly paid, and much of this stems from lack of opportunity at an early age, coupled with very low expectations. It's not an excuse for doing bugger all with your life, or feeling sorry for yourself, because that's not what I've done, but a sane society should at least level the playing field somewhat, so that there are fewer barriers against self improvement etc. That's why, at the moment, kids would rather be a drug dealer than go on one of the many fraudulent training schemes, or stack shelves for national minimum wage. The pay's better and, within their own clique, they get more respect. I can say with all honesty, that if I've made anything at all of myself, it's despite the system.

I agree that the last person the "caring services" care about is the average white , heterosexual Brit who is honest and hardworking, but government, despite it's talk, plainly sees things no differently than the Thatcherites.

Let hard work and honesty be rewarded- but give everyone the chance to BE rewarded for hard work and honesty. As for the bone idle "grasshoppers"? Let them freeze, because you'll always get those who take the piss.

1:17 PM  
Anonymous tc said...

I agree with your comments, Black Dog, I was exaggerating a tad. Much in the same way as Baz makes his points with sweeping generalities on occasion! As usual, it's the small percentage in all layers of society that screw it up for everybody else, and give rise to the sort of stereotyping in my fable - which is not original I have to say, but I thought it made a point.

5:55 AM  
Anonymous john bull said...

A Fable

Rest Of The World Version:

The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

THE END


Welcome to Comrade Stalin's Version:


The squirrel works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the grasshopper denounces the squirrel as an Enemy of the Fauna, has him arrested, beaten so badly his eyes pop out, forces him to confess to hordeing and other anti-bolshevik activities, then has him shot in the back of the head. The other squirrels take note, work harder, denounce each other and hail the grasshopper as the great socialist saviour of the forest.

The End

6:16 AM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

Ah John but what if you can get a good British plumber for a fair rate or a Pole that does not pay taxes and will do the job for a lower rate? Do you encourage this by using the Pole?

8:54 AM  
Blogger Cockneyred said...

I'd like too see squirrels wiped off the face of the planet, especially those bastards that have nested in attic of my house
thanks, carry on

1:08 PM  
Blogger Hal Horn said...

"In Soviet Russia, people opress people. I love Britain because it's the other way around!"

4:58 PM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

Is there still a Soviet Russia?
Watch the fucking squirrels - those bastard vermin will chew through you plastic plumbing and wiring!

10:51 PM  
Blogger Jimmy McTourette said...

A pig's head was found dumped outside a mosque in south Wales hours before the holy festival of Ramadan began, police have said.
It was discovered outside the Jamia Mosque in Newport at 2230 BST on Saturday, 23 September.
Gwent Police were called to the scene and have begun a hate crime inquiry to identify the culprit in what is being seen as "premeditated" attack.

In the Islamic faith the pig is considered an unclean animal.
Gwent Police's Divisional Commander for Newport, Kevin Price, said: "We are working with the Muslim community to try and find out who would have been in the street that night when the pig's head was placed at the mosque.
"We are also looking at CCTV.
"I would describe this sort of thing as very irresponsible, there was obviously an element of premeditation about it to get a pig's head and on a night of religious significance.

"It was intended to offend and I believe the person who is responsible probably has no idea just how much offence this has caused," he added.
This is really upsetting business what has happened here, especially in our festival month Alkas Ali
He said that there had been no other incidents at the mosque before.

An investigation was launched after the pig's head was found outside the Jamia Mosque in Commercial Road.

Now I know that our Polish chums are partial to eating pig's heads, could it not be that one of them had a few vodkas too many and left his supper on the pavement outside the mosque on the way home?
I'm sure we have all been guilty of dropping a fish supper or kebab in the street at sometime - hardly warrants a full investigation by plod.

10:57 PM  
Anonymous tony b.liar said...

I don't write Bazza's columns [although I sometimes wish I did!] but he is right on the money on just about everything, particularly in his outbursts on 'Political Correctness', the 'Nanny State', 'Mr Blah's Turkey Army', and the 'Scrotes' in our midst.

If we look at the very broad picture, it seems to me that over the past 60 years or so since the end of WW2:
1. Our political class has failed us lamentably in not providing the right leadership nor the correct emphasis on core values and standards.
2. Our political system is Dickensian and not adapted to the modern world. It has not given us any continuity when this is what is desperately needed. When a minority of the people vote for a party which then takes power without any legitimacy and against the wishes of the majority, this is patently unrepresentative and undemocratic. Meanwhile, the parties which have the policies which would benefit the country the most are left out in the cold with no hope of ever achieving office to enact those policies.
3. Our Civil Service has become a by-word for inadequate performance and not getting things done and by its very nature is beholden to the government of the day for its existence. It is therefore almost by definition unable to achieve anything positive for the country, other than shuffling paper.
4. Our 'education professionals' are driven by ideology and political correctness which affects their main function and priority which should be to turn out well-rounded, well behaved, well educated future members of society. We have had decades of empty-headed ''experts'' whose only priority it seems is to produce young adults able to achieve high grades at a multiplicity of questionably useful/questionably difficult exam subjects, but unable to construct the most basic sentences in their OWN language [never mind any other], and barely able to add up without a calculator.
5. Our institutions and professions - the Police, the Army, the Church, the Judiciary and so on - have found themselves attacked and pilloried [mostly] unjustifiably and [mostly]unnecessarily, which gives the impression to all and sundry that they have little relevance and value in today's world. In particular, young people can commit crimes with very little risk of being held to account. Even the law-abiding young are brainwashed into believing that they have all the rights but no responsibilities to society.
6. The media - and here I emphasize the appallingly negative impact of Mr Murdoch's global evil empire of satellite TV and newspapers - have fostered a false belief in the young that virtually anything goes and that there is only one God, money. Unbelievably crass and banal television programmes such as 'Big Brother' [and all its clones] have further eroded standards and brought new depths to 'entertainment', where people are portrayed as heroes for behaving badly.

And if we look at footballers like Messrs Rooney, Ferdinand and their peers, paid over £100000 per week, yet barely able to speak correctly [let alone count], it's small wonder that our society is in the mess it is. Our young people see the vast rewards these imbeciles receive for doing very little, hear them swearing, misbehaving, gambling and screwing around and see how the Murdoch press elevates them to hero status and think to themselves - ''hey, I want to be like that''! Much of the decline in standards is down to Mr Murdoch I fancy, and I fear that cricket will go the same way now the evil bastard has his grubby hands on. Everybody from Mr "Freebie Holiday" Bliar is on the gravy train, and everybody thinks it's OK to aspire to such standards in public and private life, and to conduct themselves in this manner.


This process of moral decay has in my view accelerated under our present so-called 'New Labour' leaders. Instead of guiding the country through difficult times and providing leadership, they have adopted a Neo-Thatcherite mantle in support for deregulation and big business [''there's no such thing as society''] and seem to have abdicated all responsibility for the actions of certain individuals. They hide behind their 'initiatives', 'league tables' and 'performance indicators' as if they were 'one-size fits all' solutions: despite what they profess, I believe that they have no 'vision' whatsoever for the country and where we should be heading. Unless you count Mr Bliar's flawed 'vision' of slavishly supporting the US of Bloody A and their appalling morally bankrupt society in their wars, their defence industry, big Oil and their casino operators. Nu Labour’s mantra for “progress” is more bureaucracy, 'Czars' and Quangoes. In fact, anything to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and to create some smoke and mirrors and spin to fool the proletariat into thinking that our ''leaders'' are actually DOING something about society's ills - rather than creating them! [Oh, and keep themselves on the gravy train for the rest of their lives, by the way.] Perfect examples of the woolly-headed thinking at the heart of government at the moment are the 'initiative' to allow 24 hour drinking, and the 'initiative' to deregulate gambling by allowing 'Super Casinos' here. Virtually every responsible institution - the Police, the medical profession, the Church, civil and community groups, EVERYBODY - is opposed to the madness of the booze culture which has been imposed on us, but the government and its friends in the alcohol industry just can't understand the furore and refuses to contemplate rethinking its proposals. Reports about binge drinking in the young, and alcoholics as young as 10 go unheeded and ignored, and they are now even trying to blame “binge drinking” on US!!. Where this will lead is pretty obvious to all except the inmates of the Fuehrerbunker, so we await yet another “initiative” from the Home Office to control binge drinking and avoid town centres for the foreseeable future.

Think that's me done for the day: must away to have an 'All Day Breakfast' at MacDonalds with all the benefit scroungers - and a 'pint of Special Brew to go'!!

Toodly pip!

11:11 PM  
Blogger Neal Asher said...

Just been on holiday. On the way out we had to remove all potential liquid explosives from our hand luggage, all pointy objects and all cigarette lighters, then remove our belt and shoes so they too could go through the scanner. While this was occurring I noticed a chap in uniform having to go through the same process and wondered if the set of wings on his uniform jacket might be considered a dangerously pointy object. Obviously pilots as potential suicide bombers are more dangerous than, say, pilots who might feel inclined to make a short diversion to Canary Wharf.

On the way back we carefully put all potential liquid explosives, lighters and pointy objects in our main luggage. Greek security pulled me over, pulled on gloves (thankfully only as a precaution against the skiddies in the case)then after a brief search ordered me to put all my cigarette lighters in my hand luggage.

Funny old world.

6:15 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

In response to Tony B's post- hope he doesn't mind?

Our political class has failed us lamentably in not providing the right leadership nor the correct emphasis on core values and standards.

Especially since Thatcher, it can hardly be called a democracy at all. They have a hundred tricks up their sleeves for undermining democracy, from the (antiquated) whip system, the guillotine (limiting how long a subject can be debated before forcing a vote), re-shuffling of constituency boundaries, (e.g tying in poor areas with richer areas to nullify votes), and the whole party propaganda system is a joke, but, unfortunately, one most people don't seem to see.

Now, it's "who gives the best speech", regardless of what they're actually saying, or how true it is. Brown is unlikely to be voted for because he's fat, ugly, supposedly inarticulate, and Scottish. (Sorry Jimmy McT, these aren't views I hold myself), whereas clean cut middle class kids like Blair and Cameron are seen as the right type. All politics, now, are about London and Westminster. As I think Lord Hailsham said about Thatcher's government, MPs are merely "Lobby Fodder", that is, they have to vote the way their party wants them to, regardless of the wishes of their constituents. Fail to do so, and they're pilloried as "rebels" and deselected at the next elections, or destined to remain back benchers.

What's worse is that the media- and hence the public- view such un-democratic activities as good. "Rebels" (often people sticking to the principles they are supposed to have at all times) are seen as "bad". We even get people saying that one should accept EVERYTHING a party does whilst in power, if you vote for them, then if you don't like them, vote them out. In short, this amounts to an "either/or" approach to democracy every 4 years and nothing inbetween.

Politicians lying is now so commonplace that debates are merely lying competitions. The public, lamentably, accepts this. We shouldn't!

Our political system is Dickensian and not adapted to the modern world

But they like their pomp. Look at their fondness for podiums and bullshit like that. I remember seeing broadcasts of Gorbachev in Soviet shipyards- stood amongst the workers, talking to them face to face. No doubt the KGB were there in numbers, but there was something far more down to earth than Teflon Tony and Bush stood at their respective podiums, expressing their mutual admiration and telling their damned lies and soundbites.

Much of the problem exists- as you say- because we've been brainwashed into thinking that only 2-3 parties can exist, and that the only viable form of government is one with a huge majority. Few think that a hung parliament would be any good, although I think it would be an excellent way to prevent the excesses we get these past 30 years. Lets not forget that the wartime government was multi party.

Our Civil Service has become a by-word for inadequate performance and not getting things done and by its very nature is beholden to the government of the day for its existence.

The civil service, by it's very nature, believes that it can outlive any government. Politicians come and go: but the institutions of civil service remain, and what's more, they come from a pretty select class. Almost always middle class reactionaries, the civil service are where most policies originate. Don't forget: "the civil servant advises, the minister decides", and it's plain to see that the former hands out advice to suit himself and his type. Consider how the civil service intentionally scuppered Harold Wilson's attempt to reform the civil service, and to instigate redistribution of wealth downwards. This, surely, is undemocratic, where power is placed into the hands of a select few who are not answerable for their manipulative behaviour to further their own ends.


Our 'education professionals' are driven by ideology and political correctness


Not just Education, but also economics, law and health. Nothing has done more to stir up racial hatred than Political Correctness. Political correctness is brainless, and pure fantasy of the worst possible sort. It has absolutely nothing to do with equality. But, like almost all our destructive influences and social/economic ideas, it's another import from America. When will we stop aping a country that has so very much wrong with it? It's like we see what doesn't work in the US and then copy it. Madness. Above all, PC is secretly intended to be divisive. "Divide and conquer", and also to present the illusion that government is progressive. Make no mistake, the country is run BY and FOR a small group of people who are determined by their money and contacts. PC is a way of seeming to want to level things out, without actually doing it.

But it strikes me that a lot of people think like we do. OK, most of them believe that they're a minority- and I don't believe that we are anymore. OK, so most of them don't go anywhere near forums like this, but sooner or later, they'll wake up and want to do something about it. Lets hope it's sooner rather than later.

4:06 PM  
Anonymous tony b.liar said...

For Black Dog:

I very much appreciated your comments and certainly don't mind in the least. I enjoy and respect your views more than anyone else on Bazza's blog-in fact our views on most things are pretty much identical. It's a pity that there are a few others out there that spoil the party, but it takes all sorts I suppose...

One theme that you recently touched on is something I have been banging on about for years now: the saddening predilection of our country to slavishly ape all things American and adopt most of the nonsense that comes from the alleged "land of the free". At its most innocent it's Messrs MacDonalds, Starbucks et al and the 'yoof' who talk in 'textspeak' monosyllables and wear daft NY Yankees baseball caps on back to front. At its worst, it's being dragged into pointless and damaging American Colonial wars on the pretext of lies and at the behest of an imbecile who is in hoc to the Military-industrial complex and the Bible Baptists. And our wonderful "leader" - well, he's the biggest disaster to afflict our country in decades. Worse than Thatcher in my view!!
Always good to read your take on events, Black Dog - keep 'em coming!!

12:35 AM  

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