Monday, February 12, 2007

Calm down, it's only a column


I’VE NEVER had much time for Liverpool and its inhabitants. I’ve been to poverty-stricken areas all over the world but Toxteth is the only place I’ve ever seen a housewife dragging her weary body, still clad in dressing gown and slippers, to the corner shop to buy a pint of loose sherry while her gaggle of barefoot children trudged down the gutter behind her. At 2.30 in the afternoon.

I’m tired of their forced jocularity and their braying celebrities, all of whom flee to leafy Surrey as soon as the bank account permits. I’m tired of their whining grief addiction and their interminable minute’s silences (if, indeed, a minute’s silence can be interminable).

I’m sick to the back teeth of their self-righteous football fans demanding “Justice for the 96” when any sane person would ask: “What about Justice for the 39?”, namely the dead Italians of the Heysel Stadium disaster. (And what is this “justice” they demand anyway? Kelvin MacKenzie’s head on a stake? Free rides to the dole office in South Yorkshire police cars?)

I was therefore unimpressed when the place was awarded Capital of Culture status for 2008. Oh joy – a Beatles theme park, Jimmy Tarbuck’s stand-up act projected onto the Liver building, and that thin, bespectacled bloke from The Scaffold reciting bad poetry in front of a crowd of tracksuit-clad car thieves. That’ll impress the Europeans.

It comes as no surprise then to read that they’re already managing to cock the whole thing up. Plans for a new £65million Museum of Liverpool have hit the rocks after the uber-trendy, weird-bearded curators have decided that as well as a pair of Roman sandals, the first Ford Anglia built at Halewood, one of the world’s oldest locomotives and Yoko Ono’s All You Need Is Love counterpane from the Montreal peace bed-in, the museum will also “celebrate” the dark side of Liverpool life. And dark it is.

The poverty, the slave trade, here we go again … bloody Hillsborough, the racist murder of Anthony Walker and the appalling saga of the Jamie Bulger case. All suitable entertainment for Japanese tourists, I’m sure you’ll agree.

Unfortunately none of the black polo neck-clad Guardianistas bothered to mention this to Jamie Bulger’s mum, Denise Fergus. They obviously take the view that such public hand-wringing is a cathartic condemnation of the Thatcher Years (even though she’d gone three years previously) and is there for all Lefties to use and abuse as it fits their political agenda.

We’ll leave the final word to her: “I am boiling with rage. What kind of callous people would think of doing this in the name of art and culture? They must be mad if they think I am going to stand by and watch them do this to the memory of my precious son.”

And you can’t say fairer than that.

WHY ARE the police wasting their time “questioning” Celebrity Big Brother housemates about the Jade versus Shilpa or Shipla or Sheila or whatever her name is barney?

We’ve got kids getting shot in their beds, paedophiles running amok in Toys ‘R Us, and the worst burglary figures in Europe, yet politically-correct Plod finds time to quiz a dopey nude model from Liverpool (yes, I can see a trend here) about a few off-hand comments delivered for the entertainment of the masses on a television show.

They’ll leave you at the mercy of the local hoodies, refuse to come out even if you’ve got an armed robber cornered in your kitchen, and dismiss rampant vandalism and anti-social behaviour as “not worth the trouble”, yet in a cell somewhere Jermaine Jackson is getting the third degree – probably aided by the use of coshes – just because he uttered the words “white trash”. It’s madness.

I’ll tell you who they ought to be having a look at – Tory MP James Gray. And as the libel lawyers go into a panic, allow me to explain.

Mr Gray is the gentleman who dumped his wife for his mistress while she was receiving treatment for breast cancer. Last week he narrowly survived an attempt to sack him as member for Wiltshire North, although there are dark mutterings about his ability to hold the seat at an election.

It now emerges that Mr Gray, in common with many other MPs, has for many years been using his Commons staff allowance to pay his wife £2,400 a month to be his secretary. Unfortunately, and according to “friends” of the woman scorned, she denies that she’s actually carried out the role for the past two years beyond answering the occasional phone call.

It should be further noted that the home in which the dumped wife lives is also subsidised by the taxpayer (you and me) to the tune of £21,000 a year.

Mr Gray says that he has secured the permission of Commons officials to continue the payments until his divorce is settled – even though he’s given her notice to quit her alleged “job”. Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn. Whatever Westminster wastrels think, this man has handed over £60,000 of our money to a “secretary” who freely admits that she doesn’t do the job. It’s a fiddle, and one which many MPs conspire to preserve.

So, all in all, and taking into account the venom of a soon-to-ex-wife, I think I’d rather see Inspector Knacker digging around in this stinking trough instead of using a cattle prod on Dirk from the A Team.

A MAD woman in Wales, who just happens to be a head teacher, has banned her 357 pupils from making Mother’s Day cards in case it upsets any children who don’t have a mother.

Helen Starkey claims that five per cent of children in her school are “separated from their birth mother or have either no contact or no regular contact with their mother”. I find that hard to believe, but will charitably put it down to the seeming inability of modern teachers to understand mathematics sufficiently to pass it on to their charges.

There is a simple point to make: while no-one wants to upset the alleged 17.85 motherless children, why should the other 95 per cent be denied a traditional Christian family activity?

22 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The 95% will be disadvantaged because there are all sorts of policies about 'inclusion' and other tosh being dreamt up.

Minorities now rule and we who can trace our family trees back to the stone age must now pander to the whims of 'Mary' from Bangalore and her 28 relatives or to the 8yr old hoodied crack addict who mustn't have his human rights violated as he and his 10 year old brother carjack you.

10:29 AM  
Anonymous mook said...

"why should the other 95 per cent be denied a traditional Christian family activity? "

Christian?.. since when was mothers day Christian? wasn't it concocted by Hallmark as a way to sell cards?

I think kids should be prevented from taking part in meaningless, greed driven, capitalist bullshit

1:11 PM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

When I was a kid, forgetting mothers day was anything but meaningless. It was my first major lesson in how vicious the female of the species can be....

Really, though: we shouldn't moan about, for example, Diwali or Ramadan and they should tolerate our "traditions", even when they are- as Mook says- greed driven capitalist bullshit.

Let's face it, the only "traditions" we have left are the ones where big business etc stand to make a few quid.

1:40 PM  
Anonymous mook said...

"Really, though: we shouldn't moan about, for example, Diwali or Ramadan and they should tolerate our "traditions", "

I don't think Bazza made any mention about "minorities" opposing mother's day, It was to do with kiddies without mums getting hurt.

But I shouldn't be surprised that respondants on here jump the gun and instinctively blame everything on those pesky immigrants.

3:03 PM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

if you read enough of my past posts, you'd see that I don't blame immigrants at all. For senseless PC schemes and incentives, I blame the PC brigade and what they're doing to damage race relations. Most of these are white, British and middle class. By constantly legislating and seeking to be "inclusive" by banning what they deem is offensive, (especially where this is "British"), they're causing resentment against those who were formerly tolerant.

I've said many times that British society's biggest problem isn't immigrants, but our own, plentiful supply of scum. I genuinely don't have a racist bone in my body, I tend to judge people by how they behave, not their ethnic background, religion or whatever.

I am not a Christian- I'm an atheist. I am not right wing, nor left wing. I despise the way politics has boiled down to an "either/or" approach by rampant careerists whose main aim is to ensure re-election, and as such can only pass popularist, empty laws which either do effectively nothing or make things worse.

The example about banning Mother's Day because some kids don't have mothers is akin- surely- to banning Christmas because a minority of children are not Christian. Now you can point out that Christmas has virtually no Christian significance, and is a mere greed-fest, and I'll wholeheartedly agree.

Besides, the poor children without mothers would surely be beset by reminders that they don't have a mother- doesn't almost all advertisement show a perfect nuclear family? Don't most soaps,films etc show this? Where do we draw the line?

I believe that legislating or ruling that British customs are exclusive to people from other backgrounds is fuelling race hatred. It's like when a former church becomes a mosque- the average Briton is furious, and yes, it's the anger of a child who has lost a toy he no longer wants (but he'll be damned if he'll let anyone else play with it). Such are the average Briton's attitudes. My opinion is that indigenous Brits sold their "heritage" many years ago, especially during the 80's and 90's, and now they've realised that they've lost it. The "Ethnics" are, by an large, scapegoats.

I don't like this any more than you do. Injustice is injustice, full stop.

Yet, it must be said that law or custom should benefit the largest number of people, and not penalise them people in favour of a minority. Misguided or not, the White British hold certain things dear. Theirs is the majority culture, theirs is the "indigenous" culture, therefore it is mild tyranny to suppress this.

3:39 PM  
Anonymous carol42 said...

Totally agree about Liverpool. I have lived in many cities in Scotland and England, Europe and the Middle East but I have never hated anywhere more than the two years I spent in Liverpool. The chip on their shoulder and their self pity depressed me and make the Scots seem cheerful. Of course I did meet some good people but they were the exception. Nothing would induce me ever to live there again.

6:39 PM  
Anonymous tony b.liar said...

I'm afraid Bazza is quite right, and Mr "Mook" has his facts wrong yet again........this from Wikipedia [that's an online Encyclopedia to all Liverpudlians out there]:
----------------------------------
British history - Mothering Sunday

Mothering Sunday, commonly called "Mother's Day" in the United Kingdom, has no direct connection to the American practice. It falls on the fourth Sunday of Lent (typically March or early April). It is believed to have originated from the 16th Century Christian practice of visiting one's mother church annually, which meant that most mothers would be reunited with their children on this day. Most historians believe that young apprentices and young women in servitude were released by their masters that weekend in order to visit their families. Its principle purpose now is celebration and thanks for mothers.
-----------------------------------

Black Dog - pleased to see that your posts have now returned to your more normal sensible and erudite levels and that you have not decended to the level of profanity seen recently!!

Last but not least, where have Bazza's disclaimers at the end of each post gone??? Please bring 'em back Baz, they were often as funny as the post itself. Has your literary muse left you perchance??

11:22 PM  
Blogger sky_dog said...

He's probably just out of rehab Tony, one thing at a time please. ;o)

12:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keep on rocking in the free world Bazza. You know it makes sense.

4:05 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

lack Dog - pleased to see that your posts have now returned to your more normal sensible and erudite levels and that you have not decended to the level of profanity seen recently!! Mr T. Bliar

Sorry about that. But txt speaking kiddies rarely understand anything else. And I only do it for the contrast....

Some folk think you're a wimp or something because you can string more than 2 sentences together. They bring out the worst in me.

6:19 AM  
Blogger Chris said...

I agree with black dog, but go sofar as to say that if Poland, Czechoslovakia or Namibia would kindly take give our "diversity officers" a new home, then I'd gladly allow more immigrants into the country...

Unfortunately, they probably reckon those self-same "diversity officers" are bone-idle layabouts who wouldn't know a hard day's work even if one came along and bit them on the arse.

6:33 AM  
Anonymous mook said...

Black Dog:
Whoa! on the blogjack there.
But out of nowhere you requested that
[b]"we shouldn't moan about, for example, Diwali or Ramadan and they should tolerate our "traditions""[/b],

I wasn't aware that any of the people who celebrate Diwali or Ramadan didn't tolerate your traditions. Rather i am distinctly under the impression that the media (bazza included) pounces on isolated, rare, headline grabbing sensationalist stories and tries to infer that this is what is going on all over the country. Simply not true, and gutter press at its worst.

My point being: As Surprising as it may be, Bazza mentioned nothing about cultural differences in his piece about mothers day, yet here it is, being used as a scapegoat (even if indirectly, via the so called "PC brigade").

and Mr. T.B. Liar:
[b]"and Mr "Mook" has his facts wrong yet again."[/b]

"Yet Again"?
what exactly do you base that on?
You seem to imply that I have [b]repeatedly[/b] got my facts wrong. Interesting.
If you read [b]your very own reference[/b] it cites that Mothers day is thought to have many origins, the greek and roman empires to name but a few. Now I'm no historian but I'm fairly sure that they both outdate 16th century Britain.
And yet another example of an ancient tradition being Hijacked by christianity (see Christmas, Easter etc..)

7:40 AM  
Anonymous mook said...

feck... how do you do Bold text on here?
aha..like this
lesson learnt

7:41 AM  
Anonymous Black Dog said...

I wasn't aware that any of the people who celebrate Diwali or Ramadan didn't tolerate your traditions.- Mook.

That's not what I'm saying, Mook- that's the irony of it all. Some white, British middle class people think that the people who traditionally celebrate the above festivals are offended by our "traditional" celebrations and traditions. And do seem bent on suppressing these, which I'm sure you'll agree is causing resentment and race tensions. OK, so the media lies, manipulates and exaggerates- nothing new there, is there? I dislike sensationalism, too.

And although you're quite right, the "Mothers Day Ban" has nothing to do with race relations per se, nevertheless, it has a lot to do with the same mentality of those who decide to make decisions that cause resentment, be it racial or otherwise.

I'm not trying to hijack Bazza's blog at all. I try to stay on topic and never introduce a new (off) topic. I believe that if one states one's view, then this should be done as fully as reasonably possible, and seeing as most of us know that little in life is as simple as some would have us believe, this can result in lengthy posts.

Not half as lengthy as the ones on my own blog, though...

Thank you, Mook, for staying civilised. I value even contradictory opinions, when politely put.

Chris: I really think you have a good point there!

8:41 AM  
Anonymous mook said...

OK, so the media lies, manipulates and exaggerates- nothing new there, is there? I dislike sensationalism, too. - Black Dog

I guess that's the crux of it for me... All this crying "the country's going down the drain" or "do-gooders" this and "PC-brigade" that, seems to be nothing more than sensationalism. People have been crying about the state of the nation for centuries, and no doubt will continue to do so. The end of the world is always nigh.
I remain to be convinced that a couple of local councils having a "winterval" represents as big a problem as some would like us to believe. Things change, Society changes.. sometimes gradually, sometimes in steps.
It's a very different world now that it was a hundred years ago, and common ways of celebrating old traditions have changed and will continue to do so.
I see that as a good thing. And if consumer Pseudo-festivals like Mothers day become casualties... well.. so much the better.

Thank you, Mook, for staying civilised
No problem.

8:57 AM  
Anonymous Ade said...

Well, I'm from (near) Liverpool, and I - well, I have to agree entirely. Scousers are, by and large, a whining freeloading bunch of scallys. Most of the best ones escaped years ago (except Cilla - bleurgh).

Since I'm nearly a Scouser, I feel justified in having this whinge :)

Anyone got any spare coppers for some fags'n'booze, only I seem to have run out of all three?

12:30 PM  
Anonymous Sniff said...

to black dog,

what's your blog?

7:55 PM  
Anonymous patrea said...

Mr "Mook" has his facts wrong yet again........ Indeed.
Why is it that something Mook claims as fact - all Mook's 'filthy capitalist blah blah' - re Mothering Sunday - is shown to be false, wrong, yet there is no acknowledgement by you?
It absolutely typifies the sheer lack of wisdom of the Left: it is just lazy, dumbed-down thinking.
A young man is tragically shot in Peckham, and at last (a few) people - no one from the Left - suggest that maybe fathers, and a nuclear family are what is required for a happy, stable child?
Maybe all relationships are not equal?
Maybe...
Life is the UK is worse than in 1997.
Happy children require a mummy and daddy
UK traditions are worth preserving
patrea
----------------------------------
British history - Mothering Sunday

Mothering Sunday, commonly called "Mother's Day" in the United Kingdom, has no direct connection to the American practice. It falls on the fourth Sunday of Lent (typically March or early April). It is believed to have originated from the 16th Century Christian practice of visiting one's mother church annually, which meant that most mothers would be reunited with their children on this day. Most historians believe that young apprentices and young women in servitude were released by their masters that weekend in order to visit their families. Its principle purpose now is celebration and thanks for mothers.
-----------------------------------

10:51 AM  
Anonymous mook said...

Patrea

maybe fathers, and a nuclear family are what is required for a happy, stable child?
yes indeed, because we all know that no-one from a happy, stable family has ever comitted a crime, don't we?.
Do you even know the family history/situations of those involved in these killings?
Thought not.
Do you think beyond the headlines and sound bites?
Thought not.

And while we're quotemining from the internet, you might want to look here http://www.floramex.com/li-momsday.htm

Quote:
During the 1600's, England celebrated a day called "Mothering Sunday", celebrated on the 4th Sunday of Lent (also called Mid-Lent Sunday)."Mothering Sunday" honored the mothers of England. As Christianity spread throughout Europe the celebration changed to honor the "Mother Church"
like I said.. another festival hijacked by Christianity.

7:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm. The scum in parliament can pay relatives to act as 'staff' yet the Revenue & Customs thugs are hounding thousands of small family businesses where this is a genuine arrangement. Search on S660 if you want some horror stories to make your blood boil. Our hard earned then gets given to these pointless vermin. As usual: Don't do as we do, do as we say! Scum!

10:40 AM  
Anonymous Tabitha Dalrymple said...

Mook said "I think kids should be prevented from taking part in meaningless, greed driven, capitalist bullshit"

Personally I would rather be Hallmark’s potential target than a victim of some nanny state authoritarian; a free citizen or consumer able to make up my own mind about what I want to buy from companies that are at least upfront, rather than the dictated to by tiny handfuls of people who are weirdly oversensitive like Mook. Mook's argument seems to be that people are gullible and thus must be watched over by caring men and women in positions of power. Funnily enough, that is the same justification used by censors throughout history, from Torquemada to Tony Blair: all of their bans are about giving a sedative to society, sanitising public discussion, and protecting people from an alleged harm. Thanks, but no thanks.

9:07 AM  
Anonymous mook said...

Tabitha "free citizen or consumer"
No Such thing I'm afraid.

7:15 AM  

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